# Custody vs Access vs Decision-Making Responsibility vs Parenting Time: What's the Difference? If you're going through a separation in Ontario, you've probably encountered confusing terminology about children. Some sources talk about "custody" and "access." Others use "decision-making responsibility" and "parenting time." Your lawyer might use one set of terms while older resources use another. This isn't just legal jargon. Understanding these terms matters because they describe different things, and the terminology has changed significantly in recent years. This guide explains what each term means, why the language changed, and how the old and new terms relate to each other. ## The Short Version **Custody** and **access** are the traditional terms that were used in Canadian family law for decades. They appear in older court orders and older resources. They are no longer used in new Divorce Act orders, and in Ontario the Children's Law Reform Act now uses the newer terms as well. **Decision-making responsibility**, **parenting time**, and **contact** are the current terms used in both the federal Divorce Act and Ontario's Children's Law Reform Act since March 2021. Here's how the old and new terms roughly relate: | Old Term | New Term | Notes | |----------|----------|-------| | Custody | Decision-making responsibility | Custody also often included where the child primarily lived, not just decision-making | | Access (by a parent) | Parenting time | Time a parent spends with the child | | Access (by a non-parent) | Contact | Time a grandparent or other non-parent spends with the child | But the new terms aren't just new names for the same things. They represent a shift in how the law thinks about parenting after separation. **Note for readers outside Ontario:** Provincial and territorial family laws across Canada are not uniform. While the federal Divorce Act uses the new terminology Canada-wide, other provinces and territories may use different words for parenting arrangements in their own legislation. This guide focuses on Ontario and the federal Divorce Act. ## Why Did the Terminology Change? On March 1, 2021, major amendments to the federal [Divorce Act](/glossary#letter-d) came into effect. At the same time, Ontario updated its Children's Law Reform Act to align with the new terminology. One of the most visible changes was replacing "custody" and "access" with "decision-making responsibility," "parenting time," and "contact." The change wasn't just cosmetic. It reflected a philosophical shift in how the law approaches parenting after separation. ### Problems with "Custody" and "Access" The old language had issues. **"Custody" sounds like ownership.** Parents don't own children. But the word "custody" (think "taking someone into custody") implies control and possession. This framing encouraged parents to fight over "winning" custody as if the child were a prize. **"Custody" bundled different concepts together.** The old term combined decision-making authority with where the child lived. These are separate issues that don't have to go together, and separating them often makes more sense. **"Access" sounds like a consolation prize.** The parent with "access" was often seen as the lesser parent, someone who got to visit their own child. This didn't reflect the reality that both parents remain parents after separation. **The language was adversarial.** When one parent "gets custody" and the other "gets access," it creates winners and losers. This framing fueled conflict rather than encouraging cooperation. ### What the New Language Emphasizes The new terms focus on the child's needs and relationships rather than parental rights and control. **"Parenting time"** emphasizes that both parents continue to parent. Neither parent is just "visiting." When a child is with either parent, that parent is parenting. **"Decision-making responsibility"** focuses on what actually needs to happen: making decisions about the child's life. It's functional rather than possessive. **"Contact"** clearly distinguishes time with non-parents (like grandparents) from parenting time with parents. The hope is that this language encourages parents to focus on their children's needs rather than on winning against each other. ## What Each Term Actually Means Let's break down what each term covers. ### Custody (Old Term, No Longer Used in New Orders) Under the old framework, **custody** referred to both the right to make major decisions about a child's life and often (though not always) where the child primarily lived. This bundling of concepts caused confusion. **Sole custody** meant one parent had the right to make major decisions. The child typically lived primarily with that parent. **Joint custody** meant both parents shared decision-making. The child might live primarily with one parent or might split time between both homes. The term is no longer used in new Divorce Act orders or in Ontario's Children's Law Reform Act proceedings, but you may encounter it in older court orders, older separation agreements, and older legal resources. ### Access (Old Term, No Longer Used in New Orders) **Access** was the time spent with the child by someone who didn't have custody. When a parent had access, they had the right to spend time with their child according to a schedule, but typically didn't have decision-making authority. Access could also be granted to non-parents, like grandparents, who had court-ordered time with a child. Under the new terminology, access by a parent is now called "parenting time," while access by a non-parent is now called "contact." ### Decision-Making Responsibility (Current Term) **Decision-making responsibility** refers to the authority to make significant decisions about a child's welfare. This includes decisions about health (medical treatment, dental care, mental health services), education (which school, educational support, religious education), culture, language, religion, and spirituality, and significant extracurricular activities. Decision-making responsibility can be allocated in different ways. **Sole decision-making responsibility** means one parent makes these decisions alone. **Joint decision-making responsibility** means both parents must agree on major decisions. This requires communication and cooperation. **Divided decision-making responsibility** means each parent has final say over different areas. For example, one parent might have responsibility for education decisions while the other has responsibility for health decisions. **Parallel parenting** arrangements sometimes give each parent decision-making authority during their own parenting time for day-to-day matters, with a specific process for major decisions. ### Parenting Time (Current Term) **Parenting time** is the time a child is in the care of a parent. During parenting time, that parent is responsible for the child's day-to-day care and supervision, and has the authority to make day-to-day decisions about the child (unless a court orders otherwise). Both parents have parenting time. The parent with more time isn't the "real" parent and the other one a visitor. Both are parenting. Parenting time schedules can take many forms: week-on/week-off (equal time), every other weekend plus one evening (traditional schedule), 2-2-3 rotations, or any other arrangement that works for the family. The schedule is based on the [best interests of the child](/glossary#letter-b), not on what either parent "deserves." ### Contact (Current Term, For Non-Parents) **Contact** is time that people other than parents spend with a child. This includes grandparents, other relatives, and other significant people in the child's life. Contact is different from parenting time. A grandparent with a contact order has the right to spend time with the grandchild, but they don't have parenting responsibilities or decision-making authority. Under the old terminology, this was also called "access," which created confusion between a parent's access (now parenting time) and a non-parent's access (now contact). ## Which Terms Apply to Your Case? Since March 2021, both the federal Divorce Act and Ontario's provincial law use the new terminology. ### If You're Divorcing (Divorce Act) If you're married and getting divorced, or if you're already divorced and dealing with parenting issues, the federal **Divorce Act** applies. This is true anywhere in Canada. The court will use **decision-making responsibility**, **parenting time**, and **contact**. ### If You Were Never Married in Ontario (Provincial Law) If you were never married (common-law partners or other unmarried parents) and you're in Ontario, the **Children's Law Reform Act** applies. Ontario has also updated its terminology, so you will see **decision-making responsibility**, **parenting time**, and **contact** in Ontario court materials and forms. Older orders and older resources may still use "custody" and "access," but current proceedings use the new terminology. ### If You're in Another Province or Territory If you were never married and live outside Ontario, your province or territory's family law legislation applies. Provincial and territorial laws across Canada are not uniform. While some jurisdictions have adopted terminology similar to the Divorce Act, others may use different words for parenting arrangements. If you're unsure which terms apply in your jurisdiction, consult a local family law lawyer or check your province's or territory's court forms. ### If You Have an Older Order If you have a custody or access order from before March 2021, it's still valid. You don't need to update it just because the terminology changed. However, if you go back to court to vary (change) your order, the new order will use the new terminology. ## Practical Differences Beyond the language, are there practical differences between the old and new frameworks? ### The Legal Test Is the Same Both the old and new frameworks focus on the **best interests of the child**. This has always been the central principle in Canadian family law regarding children. The Divorce Act and Ontario's Children's Law Reform Act now include detailed lists of factors courts must consider when determining best interests, but the overall approach of putting children first hasn't changed. ### The Range of Arrangements Is the Same You could have equal shared parenting under the old system (joint custody with equal time), and you can have it under the new system (joint decision-making responsibility with equal parenting time). You could have one parent making all decisions under the old system (sole custody), and you can have that under the new system (sole decision-making responsibility). The available arrangements haven't changed. The words used to describe them have. ### Clearer Separation of Concepts One practical improvement is that the new terminology separates concepts that were bundled together under "custody." Under the old system, "custody" combined decision-making authority with residential arrangements, which created confusion. A parent could have "joint custody" but the child might live primarily with one parent. Under the new system, **decision-making responsibility** (who makes major decisions) is clearly separate from **parenting time** (how time is divided). This makes it easier to craft arrangements that fit each family's needs. ### Attitude and Approach May Differ The biggest practical difference may be in how parents, lawyers, and judges approach these issues. The new language encourages everyone to think about what the child needs rather than what each parent "wins." It emphasizes that both parents remain parents and that the goal is a workable arrangement, not a victory. This shift in framing can affect negotiations. Parents who might have fought bitterly over "custody" may find it easier to discuss "how we'll share decision-making responsibility." Of course, high-conflict separations remain high-conflict regardless of terminology. New words don't automatically create cooperation. ## Common Parenting Arrangements Regardless of which terms are used, here are common arrangements you might encounter. ### Primary Residence with One Parent The child lives primarily with one parent and has parenting time with the other parent on a schedule. This might be every other weekend plus one evening per week, or it might be more or less frequent depending on circumstances. Decision-making responsibility might be joint (both parents decide together) or sole (the primary parent decides). ### Shared Parenting Time The child spends significant time with both parents, often close to equal. Common schedules include week-on/week-off, 2-2-3 (two days with one parent, two days with the other, then three days alternating), and 5-2-2-5 patterns. Decision-making responsibility is usually joint in shared parenting arrangements, though not always. For child support purposes, "shared parenting" typically means each parent has at least 40% of the parenting time. See our guide on [how the child support calculator works](/blog/child-support-ontario-how-calculator-works) for more on this. ### Parallel Parenting In high-conflict situations where parents cannot communicate effectively, **parallel parenting** arrangements minimize the need for interaction. Each parent makes day-to-day decisions during their own parenting time, with very specific rules about exchanges, communication, and how major decisions are handled. This isn't ideal, but it can protect children from ongoing parental conflict. ### Supervised Parenting Time When there are safety concerns (history of violence, substance abuse, mental health issues, or risk of abduction), parenting time may be **supervised**. This means a third party is present during the parent's time with the child. Supervision might be by a family member, a professional supervisor, or at a supervised access centre. It may be temporary (while a parent addresses issues) or longer-term. ### No Parenting Time In rare cases, a parent may have no parenting time at all. This happens when any contact with that parent would harm the child. It's an extreme outcome reserved for serious situations. ## What About Grandparents and Other Family Members? Grandparents and other family members don't have automatic rights to time with children, but they can apply to the court for contact. Under the Divorce Act, anyone can apply for a **contact order** with leave (permission) of the court. The court considers whether the contact is in the child's best interests. Under Ontario's Children's Law Reform Act, grandparents and others can also apply for contact. The court will consider the existing relationship between the applicant and child, among other factors. ## How Parenting Arrangements Are Decided Whether you're dealing with the Divorce Act or provincial law, the process for deciding arrangements is similar. ### Agreement Between Parents The best outcome is when parents can agree on arrangements themselves, possibly with help from a [mediator](/blog/how-to-choose-a-divorce-mediator-in-ontario) or through [collaborative family law](/glossary#letter-c). Agreements can be included in a [separation agreement](/blog/separation-agreement-ontario-what-to-include) or, if you're divorcing, in a consent court order. ### Court Determination If parents can't agree, a court will decide. The court's only concern is the best interests of the child. Neither parent has an automatic advantage. Courts consider many factors, including the child's needs, each parent's ability to meet those needs, the child's existing relationships, each parent's willingness to support the child's relationship with the other parent, any history of family violence, and the child's own views (depending on age and maturity). For more on how courts approach these decisions, see our guide on [how custody decisions are made in Ontario](/blog/when-courts-order-sole-decision-making-responsibility-full-custody-canada). ## Using the Right Language If you're preparing court documents or negotiating an agreement, which terms should you use? ### In Court Proceedings Use the current terminology: **decision-making responsibility**, **parenting time**, and **contact**. This applies whether you're proceeding under the Divorce Act or Ontario's Children's Law Reform Act. Current court forms use these terms. Using old terminology like "custody" and "access" may cause confusion or require clarification. ### In Agreements Use the current terminology in separation agreements. This ensures consistency with how courts and legislation now describe these concepts. The important thing is that everyone understands what the agreement means. Clear, specific language about actual arrangements matters more than anything else. ### In Everyday Conversation In everyday life, many people still say "custody" and "access" because those terms are familiar. There's nothing wrong with that in casual conversation. What matters is that you understand what the legal terms mean when you encounter them in court documents or legal discussions. Some parents prefer the new language because it feels more respectful. Others find "custody" and "access" clearer because they're more commonly understood outside legal contexts. Use whatever works for your family in everyday conversation, but be prepared to use the current terms in legal matters. ## Key Takeaways **"Custody" and "access"** are the old terms that were used in Canadian family law for decades. They are no longer used in new Divorce Act orders, and in Ontario the Children's Law Reform Act now uses the newer terms as well. Older court orders and resources may still use the old terminology. **"Decision-making responsibility," "parenting time," and "contact"** are the current terms used in both the federal Divorce Act (which applies Canada-wide to divorcing and divorced parents) and Ontario's Children's Law Reform Act since March 2021. **Other provinces and territories** may use different terminology in their own family legislation. If you're outside Ontario and not divorcing, check what terms your jurisdiction uses. The old term **"custody"** bundled together decision-making authority and residential arrangements. The new terminology separates these: **decision-making responsibility** is about major decisions, while **parenting time** is about the schedule. The old term **"access"** covered both parents and non-parents. Now, **parenting time** refers to time with parents, while **contact** refers to time with non-parents like grandparents. **Parenting time** is time the child is in the care of a parent, during which that parent can make day-to-day decisions about the child (unless a court orders otherwise). The **best interests of the child** remain the central principle regardless of which terminology is used. If you have an **older order** using "custody" and "access," it's still valid. New proceedings will use the current terminology. The practical arrangements available (shared parenting, sole decision-making, supervised time, etc.) are the **same under both frameworks**. The words have changed more than the substance. ### Disclaimer This article provides general information about parenting terminology in Canadian family law, with a focus on Ontario and the federal Divorce Act. It is not legal advice. Provincial and territorial laws vary across Canada. For advice about your situation, speak to a family law lawyer in your jurisdiction.